There is a very thin line between freedom and restriction. A thin line which we can all impose on ourselves. An example of freedom is the use of the internet. Yes, we are free to do anything we want but there is the restriction that even on the internet, we should be courteous and polite. A big factor of this is our school's name and reputation. Since we represent our school, we should act accordingly. This doesn't mean that we should never let ourselves have some freedom but of course, when there is freedom, there is also responsibility. If you lack either one of the two, you're going to have a bad time. Yes, you may be free but are you responsible?

01:28

"isn’t it ironic

how we kill

flowers

because we

think that

they are

beautiful

but we

kill ourselves

because we

think that we

are not"

As teenagers, we tend to have these thoughts that make us doubt ourselves, our existence and basically anything and everything. I, too have encountered this. Let me tell you this, it gets better. I know it's ironic because I, too tend to get too deep in my thoughts that I eventually have a hard time to escape out of them. I encounter problems, I'm pretty sure we all do. The thing that pains me the most is when someone I know is fighting with depression and it's like they're in knee-deep water but they don't know it. You keep telling them to "stand up" but they don't want to. Accepting who you are, being positive and moving on are the keys to a better life. If you need someone to talk to, don't be shy. You aren't the only human being in this world who has experienced that. We all have cracks or flaws but these cracks are the places that allow the light to shine inside of us. Don't be scared to let the light flow.

01:14

My hands were made for good, not for evil. They were made to play the piano; to play the notes to make beautiful music that would echo hauntingly in the air, not for beating people up and coloring their skin making it blue and purple. These hands were made to punch dough to make them softer for chewy cookies and not for making people your personal punching bags. These hands were made to wrap gifts and not for wrapping around people's necks and choking them to death. These hands were made to write beautiful things, and not a suicide note. Your hands were made for good, not for evil. 

00:58

Here is where I am my true self and here is where I can release anything and everything. Pain, anger, hate and sometimes even love. No one exactly knows what I do inside my room and let me tell you, I don't do much. Basically, I just sleep, surf the internet, sometimes even eat here and mostly I just think about every single thing that comes up in my mind. I feel so free when I am inside my room even though it isn't much but it's still the greatest place on earth for me. On warm days, I can always blast the air conditioner without anyone else complaining that it's too cold. While on cold days, I just snuggle up in my very comfortable duvet without having to share it with anyone. This is my sanctuary. Where I can let out all my emotions without all those nosy people asking why, who or what. This is where I can relax and just calm down. This is also where I do random things like arrange my books, doodle and sing. This is heaven on earth and it's nowhere but home.

18:52

If you know what my title means, kudos to you! And if you don't, it basically means "The CAT" (eliminate the word "Training" because it will be redundant). The Citizenship Advancement Training lasted for three days. For three days, we had to jog around the campus or so for 10-15 rounds every single morning without stretching. Waking up at 6:30 am, showering and prepping myself up until 7 am and by 7:30 I would be on my way to school already. All the time, energy and effort paid off after those three days of absolute torture. Of course, I'm exaggerating seeing as I am not athletic. I'm more of a "stay-at-home-and-hunch-over-a-laptop" person. Anyways, I'm grateful that I participated in this training because it taught me that I need to learn more survival skills because I want to live and I don't want to die knowing that after Level 1 of a survival game that is life, I take one step into this world of ours, I trip and then that's the end. I don't want that and I don't think anyone wants that. Again, I'm exaggerating about the end thing. My point here is that in this world of ours where resources are becoming more scarce and scarce by the minute, we should all learn how to be resourceful and wise. I was welcomed into the world where everything was already laid out in front of me. I had a great childhood because basically all I did was sleep, play, wake up, eat and go to kindergarten. I was born into this world when my parents decided to have (what were considered as luxuries before but now they're necessities) a car, an air conditioner and a permanent house. Another important thing that this 3-day roller coaster taught me is that if you are exposed enough to the reality that is life, you can actually appreciate what ordinary people do for you like your parents or your friends. Everyone's fighting their own battle, try not to be too hard on them. You can't control the sea but you can always adjust the sails because it's never too late to change the direction of your life.

07:14

Hello, dear reader. I really hope you were not expecting something exciting to read because basically I'm just going to talk about my summer this 2013. The term "summer" stereo typically means having to go to parties, not having enough time for sleep or staying up all night. Basically my summer was just like any summer except this year, I had to go to a review for the entrance exams which I shall take a few months from now. So it's like I went back to school except the people I had to be with didn't come from the same school as I do. A few friends/school mates were also with me throughout the 4-week review. I was with people from Westbridge, CPU, Huasiong, and one came all the way from Luzon. After those 4-weeks of discussions and me being clueless 75% of the time of what was going on, summer officially started for me. The remaining of my summer included staying up late surfing the waves, (no I'm just kidding) surfing the internet, diving into an Olympic-sized swimming pool (again, I'm kidding) diving into my mess of a bed, surrounding myself with pillows and my very thick duvet with, of course, the air conditioner on full blast. It might not be how others define summer, but for me, summer is about relaxing and having all the time in the world to do anything I want, when I want to do it and how I want to do it (if my mom says it's okay, of course). So basically, I'm a sloth in real life but what can I say? I'm a teenager.

06:55

Hello, today I am going to introduce myself. Basically, I'm a fifteen year old with mood swings and with unclear and tangled thoughts. I don't know how I manage to form sentences when expected to do so. I live under the pressure to be perfect and also the desire to be a better person than who I was before. I made "mistakes" when I was younger but those were the best mistakes I ever had. Those decisions shaped who I am today and I'm proud of myself for changing. 

I may come off as shy and awkward at first but when you get to know me better you'll know that I possess both of those personalities but I also have a few more. I get grumpy, I get annoyed, I get sad, I become happy and I cry. So in summary, I am your regular teenager. But somehow, I'm not. Stereo typically saying, yes, I am a teenager. But I do not think like one when I want to. I tend to become more than what society expects of me at the raw age of 15. I become a professional therapist when my friends are sad or when they have problems and I also become this war-freak girl when it comes to competitions especially when I'm leading a certain group of people. The ironic thing is, I can't save myself even if all I have to do is just stand up in the knee-deep water that I am in. I am being suffocated by my thoughts and they are slowly getting the best of me. I know it's wrong to say that I feel like no one cares about me but sometimes I just get that feeling of having no one to talk to. I feel like all my friends are just here to listen to my problems just because they're curious. I know, I know. At least I even have friends. I'm sorry if I bored you but I just wanted to let all of those out and now I'm partially done.

So, tell me about yourself?

06:03