Here's a photo of a 7-petal flower that Kristah found at school. If you think that a 6-petal flower is hard to find, how about a 7-petal one?
Taken last Monday (October 21) during our CAF performance task at the St. Anne's Hall. We were acting as our characters for the day when I accidentally set the camera on timer and it had captured this photo. So far, this is my favorite photo of the St. Anne's Hall in another perspective.
Hair in a bun, crooked glasses, notebooks and pieces of paper just piling up, and a restless mind. The exams are near. With just a day left to study, the second quarter exams are now pushing themselves into my very hectic schedule without my permission. I'm a crammer. I study on the last minute and to tell you frankly, cramming does work for me. I always tell myself to study a week before the final examinations of the quarter, but I never found myself doing so. The second quarter examinations also mark the end of another chapter and the start of a new one. So, to begin the third quarter on a positive note, I shall study harder and focus more on the remaining 2 quarters left of my senior year.
Hopefully, I can fulfill this promise and I won't slack off (and procrastinate).
Lately, I've been loving my black shoes and I don't know why. Maybe because of the simplicity of the design or maybe because of the modesty that I see in it, or maybe, just maybe, I like the color. They say that "yellow is the new black" and things like that but what I can only say is that, "black is the new black". Black represents strength and also simplicity. Contrary to what most people believe, I think that black is purer than white. Now, why do I say so? For me, I would prefer black and white things but more on black because it would be less messier as time goes by. It would still remain as black and the stains wouldn't be seen that much, not unless the stains were caused by bleach. Black calms me down and I don't know why, but it does.
Black is the old and the new black.
It's that kind of season again, folks! Playfest-season. This picture was taken on the very last first time use of the St. Anne's Hall for us, the learners of SME, as seniors. I felt a mixture of different feelings; sad, nervous, happy, and excited. As the documentator for our CAF play, I took a lot of photos because as they say, "Take a picture, it'll last longer." and I want this memory to last longer than all the plays combined.
"Please raise your right hand." And then, there's Leo. (c) Samantha Sison
Playing with the exposure on my camera using the side lights.
Backstage
Lately, I've been isolating myself from my friends. I haven't disconnected that line of the friendship, but somehow a huge wall (which I, myself, built) is now between it. I've been feeling alone and marooned. I know that I was the one who distanced myself but I just couldn't help it. It has become a habit of mine to push away people (not literally) who seem to care for me. I have trust issues. I mean, who doesn't? I don't go around telling people what's wrong with me because I'm afraid that they'll judge me because of what I am going through. I'm going through life and I think it's pretty normal that I am moody at times and I don't want to talk.
Another thing is that when people see that I'm quite calm and my face goes on neutral mode, they assume that something's wrong with me. I don't like being asked how I am doing and I don't like it when people keep on pressing me to tell them what's wrong even when there is NOTHING wrong. I've come to like being quiet and alone. I'm a loner? Okay, if you say so. But mind you, I can approach people and become friends with them, but I choose not to. I prefer to stay inside my own little bubble and just observe the outside world from inside of it. For the sake of some people, I do try to communicate and socialize more just to shut their pie holes and their restless mind. This is what I am; alone, an outcast, and unsociable. I am marooned.
Another thing is that when people see that I'm quite calm and my face goes on neutral mode, they assume that something's wrong with me. I don't like being asked how I am doing and I don't like it when people keep on pressing me to tell them what's wrong even when there is NOTHING wrong. I've come to like being quiet and alone. I'm a loner? Okay, if you say so. But mind you, I can approach people and become friends with them, but I choose not to. I prefer to stay inside my own little bubble and just observe the outside world from inside of it. For the sake of some people, I do try to communicate and socialize more just to shut their pie holes and their restless mind. This is what I am; alone, an outcast, and unsociable. I am marooned.
"Are you a dreamer or a fool?" This question during our English class last week really made me think, who am I, really? Am I still the same kid that loved making forts out of books and pillows? Or am I the same kid who wanted to be the doctor? Growing up, I was a dreamer. I always dreamed of having a great life someday; living inside a house with a slide instead of stairs, having a Golden Retriever as a pet and probably a really nice car. Growing up also made me a fool and also a fool out of me. When I was still in elementary, I usually fooled myself that my limit is only up to my limit. I did not try to push, I rarely tried to get involved, and I became careless. Even though I still am a fool today, I have learned that being a fool is a part of being a dreamer. You can't be a dreamer without trying to fool yourself that you can be, even though you know that there's a possibility that you may not achieve that dream. In this way, you're fooling yourself. In my opinion and from experience, you can't be one without the other; you can't be the dreamer without being a fool and you can't be the fool without being a dreamer. It just kind of works that way.
I've somehow balanced being a dreamer and a fool because even though I can get foolish and make mistakes, I get to learn from those mistakes and keep on continuing and correcting my dreams. It's all part of growing up and whoever said growing up doesn't suck was probably more of a dreamer. Growing up does suck, but it also has its upsides. You get to be taller, you get to understand things in a different perspective, and you get to do whatever you want to do (as long as your mom approves of it).
I've somehow balanced being a dreamer and a fool because even though I can get foolish and make mistakes, I get to learn from those mistakes and keep on continuing and correcting my dreams. It's all part of growing up and whoever said growing up doesn't suck was probably more of a dreamer. Growing up does suck, but it also has its upsides. You get to be taller, you get to understand things in a different perspective, and you get to do whatever you want to do (as long as your mom approves of it).
